Friday Funnies: Gas Crisis
Fast & Flatulent: ‘Friday Funnies’ Lets the Motorcycle Comedy Rip
There are many forms of comedy. Today’s Harley-Davidson Forums “Friday Funny” is the lowest form of that genre: the fart joke.
Hittin’ the High Notes Like Honda
A guy suffering from an unusual ailment goes to see his doctor. At the doc’s office, he nervously whispers to the doctor: “Every time I fart, it sounds like a Honda motorcycle starting up.”
The doctor tells his patient: “OK, let’s see. Pull down your pants and bend over.”
As the patient is bending and dropping his pants, he lets a big, loud one rip. Sure enough, it sounds exactly like a Honda motorbike.
The doctor ponders the situation and looks puzzled for a moment. He then excitedly exclaims, “I know what is! I know the problem! You’ve got an abscess up your ass.”
The patient looks confused and responds, “What?!? Surely an abscess can’t make my farts sound like that?”
The doctor says, “Didn’t you know? Abscess makes the fart go Honda!”
Dog Day Afternoon
A young guy hops on his motorcycle and makes the long trip to pick up his date at her family’s home on the outskirts of town. She’s not ready yet, so he has to sit in the living room and wait.
Unfortunately, he has a bad case of gas from a burrito and the long ride. His belly is knotted up and he really needs to relieve some pressure. Fast.
Just then, the family dog jumps up on the couch and sits next to him. He decides that he can probably squeeze one out and if anyone notices, they’ll think that the dog did it.
He looks around and notices his date’s mom is in the adjacent kitchen. But she is too far away to notice much.
Then, right as he farts, the mom yells out: “Spot! Get down from there!”
Relieved, he whispers to himself, “Great, they think the dog did it.” He is feeling confident and releases another fart. Again, the mom yells out to the dog: “Spot! Get down from there right now!”
This goes on for a couple more farts until his bloating stomach is just about relieved. Then, as he lets out one final fart, the mom screams, “Spot! Get down before he craps on you!”