Divorce Letter Gone Bad
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Divorce Letter Gone Bad - 5/7/2008 12:46:03 PM
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Calicruiser
Posts: 106
Joined: 7/11/2006
From: So Cal
Status: offline
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Dear Wife:
I ' m writing you this letter to tell you that I ' m leaving you
forever. I ' ve been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing
to show for it.These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to
tell me that you quit your job today and that was the last straw.
Last week, you came home and didn ' t even notice that I had a new
haircut, had cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new pair of
silk boxers. You ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after
watching all of your soaps. You don ' t tell me you love me anymore; you
don ' t want sex or anything that connects us as husband and wife.
Either you ' re cheating on me or you don ' t love me anymore;
whatever the case, I ' m gone.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. Don ' t try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving away to
West Virginia together! Have a great life!
_______________________________________________________________
Dear Ex-Husband -
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It ' s
true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good
man is a far cry from what you ' ve been. I watch my soaps so much because
they drown out your constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn ' t
work.
I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the first
thing that came to mind was ' You look just like a girl! ' Since my mother
raised me not to say anything if you can ' t say something nice, I didn ' t
comment.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me
confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the
$49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed that it was a
coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that
morning.
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work
it out. So when I hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job
and bought us two tickets to Jamaica . But when I got home you were gone.
Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling
life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won ' t get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed,
Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell and Free!
P.S. I don ' t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla
was born Carl. I hope that ' s not a problem.
_____________________________
06 Ultra Classic
Stage II 95 Upgrade
V & H Big Shot Duals and Fuelpak
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RE: Divorce Letter Gone Bad - 5/7/2008 12:59:17 PM
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towboattrash34
Posts: 566
Joined: 9/25/2007
Status: offline
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_____________________________
06 Dyna Lowrider
95 Heads by Joe Mondello
SEII's w/stage1 and SERT
J&E 10.5.1 pistons
Woods TW-7H cams and springs
Built and tuned by Ben @ Knoxville Harley
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[/image] 2008 Road King vance & hines true-duals,vance & hines ovals, s/e air cleaner.
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