ATM Machines!!!!!

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ATM Machines!!!!!

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ATM Machines!!!!! - 5/20/2008 7:27:07 AM

big_al

Posts: 2960
Joined: 10/16/2007
Status: offline

MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:

'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM
machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their
vehicles.

Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures
outlined below when accessing their accounts.

After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been
developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender.'

*******************************
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.

*******************************

FEMALE PROCEDURE:
What is really funny is that most of this part is the Truth.!!!!

1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with
the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate
card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its
excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the
inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of
checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the
slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.

Post #: 1

RE: ATM Machines!!!!! - 5/20/2008 11:37:54 AM

framer

Posts: 459
Joined: 11/15/2007
From: Thurmont,MD
Status: offline

Now that thars funny...I dont care who ya are

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(in reply to big_al)

Post #: 2

RE: ATM Machines!!!!! - 6/19/2008 6:42:07 AM

Dutch550

Posts: 260
Joined: 2/6/2008
Status: offline

so true

(in reply to framer)

Post #: 3

RE: ATM Machines!!!!! - 6/20/2008 7:32:10 AM

Haulen Ass

Posts: 366
Joined: 11/5/2007
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

That is priceless

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(in reply to Dutch550)

Post #: 4

RE: ATM Machines!!!!! - 6/21/2008 4:11:33 AM

RoadKing62

Posts: 7206
Joined: 7/10/2007
From: Boston, Mass
Status: offline

that is soooo funny, yet soooo true!!!

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"Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one''''s courage."

(in reply to Haulen Ass)

Post #: 5

RE: ATM Machines!!!!! - 6/21/2008 7:40:48 AM

spike95

Posts: 753
Joined: 5/24/2007
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

Hilarious! \\;\\\\\\; I find this to be especially true of the unemployed trophy wives that live in the neighborhoods \\;\\\\\\;near me. \\;\\\\\\; I''''ve known some working women that would smack you for this one though!
\\;
I especially liked this one because I work on ATM machines for a living.

< Message edited by spike95 -- 6/21/2008 7:41:33 AM >

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