I cannot help myself!!
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Road Warrior
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 1,616
Likes: 17
From: Mid West
I cannot help myself!!
I cannot help it, I am BOOMFM and read this today, it had me rolling:
The Man Rules
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!
It is TOO FUNNY, I will write again as I can regain feelings in my hands from the trauma to my head and as I return to the house from the garage!!!!!!
Ride like there is no tomorrow, play as you may never get the chance again.
The Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally , the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear "the rules"
From the female side.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear "the rules"
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
FIRST & FOREMOST RULE
FIRST & FOREMOST RULE
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports, It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days..
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials....
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We haveno idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched..
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine....Really .
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Nascar
or Football ..
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports, It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days..
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials....
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We haveno idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched..
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine....Really .
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Nascar
or Football ..
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
Ride like there is no tomorrow, play as you may never get the chance again.
Road Master
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 860
Likes: 1
From: Deep South Texas
Well nothing to do with touring motorcycles but entertaining. I often wondered what was up with the female forum where men are not allowed. I don't go where I'm not wanted but what would it be like if all the women who had questions were directed to the female forum. I know I'm gonna get blasted.
Grand HDF Member
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 4,505
Likes: 379
From: Florida
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Outstanding HDF Member
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 2,590
Likes: 6
From: Indiana
+1 that. Post us a link so we can watch the fireworks that follow 
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