Help me get my confidence back
Road Captain
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 601
Likes: 0
From: Florida
After my second oldest son was killed on his Harley, I could not ride for about 2 months. I have ridden off and on all my life. Finally, one day I was out in the garage looking at my Sporty, and thought about it. I thought if my son had been killed in a car wreck, would I stop driving the car. I got on and took a short ride. I am fortunate to live in a very rural area with lots of back roads with little traffic. I slowly built my confidence back up, and two years ago I sold the Sporty that I had been riding for 23 years and bought my 99 FXSTC. I have put 14,000 miles on it so far. Everybody is different, and you just have to find your own way. Since you do love to ride I think you will find the way that works for you.
Road Captain
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 702
Likes: 1
From: Kawartha lakes, Ontario, Canada
Keep to short rides at first, try to find some quiet backroads. Every trip will help reinforce that confidence level. Many of us have gone through this, mostly we come out better, safer more aware riders. Hang in there!
Banned
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 1,036
Likes: 67
Snake bit
Man, you have been snake bit one too many times. You have lost your confidence and are a detriment to your own safety and well being. You need to sell out and chill for awhile before you kill youself or your wife. It happens sometimes. Don't loose any sleep over it, just do it before you get hurt. Maybe someday you will feel differently, but I doubt it. Once bit, always shy. Twice bit, stay away. I see no point in pumping you up. You know what you have to do.
Stellar HDF Member
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,856
Likes: 127
From: Middle of Kansas
I agree with it will make you a more aware and safe driver. My son was killed in 2003, and since then I do not take the chances that I use to. I am very aware of what is going on around me. I slow down when going through timber lined roads where I can't see the deer. But I do really enjoy riding. I will be 71 years old in november, and will keep riding as long as I can. I am retired so can ride whenever I want to. Some days I will do 200 or more miles, others maybe only 15 or 20. I do ride almost every day, sometimes with a group of 5 to 15 others, but mostly by myself. Hang in there.
Banned
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 20,823
Likes: 1,506
From: Nowhere
The absolute best advice I got from my MSF instructor was, "do not swing a leg over your bike unless you are prepared to survive an accident." I think he meant to be sure and wear my gear, but what I took away from it was: If you are not right in your head, you should not be riding. A lack of confidence will get you killed quicker than anything else.
Its a bit ironic. You have survived 3 mishaps and you are worried you won't survive the next one?
Its a bit ironic. You have survived 3 mishaps and you are worried you won't survive the next one?
Road Warrior
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,589
Likes: 2
From: USA
I actually have a very good solution for ya.
Go down to the local junkyard that sells runners for cheap, get a little 80cc bike that nobody else is really gonna want, shouldn't pay more than $200, load it up into the truck & you & your buddy go out & wreck it into a tree, an embankment, jump it off of burms, & kick it a few times., ya know do some wheelies & just let it go--natural I mean to remove yourself from the cycle before it bashes into something--but, just go out there & get it out of your system, let your mind scream.
Go down to the local junkyard that sells runners for cheap, get a little 80cc bike that nobody else is really gonna want, shouldn't pay more than $200, load it up into the truck & you & your buddy go out & wreck it into a tree, an embankment, jump it off of burms, & kick it a few times., ya know do some wheelies & just let it go--natural I mean to remove yourself from the cycle before it bashes into something--but, just go out there & get it out of your system, let your mind scream.
Club Member
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 145,895
Likes: 821
From: 40 miles Northeast of Indy..
Only U will know when its time.
People can get busted up anywhere, at any time.
If its not Ur time, its not Ur time.
Kinda like the "falling off a horse", ole saying.
People can get busted up anywhere, at any time.
If its not Ur time, its not Ur time.
Kinda like the "falling off a horse", ole saying.
HD Forum Stories
The Best of Harley-Davidson for Lifelong Riders
6 Weirdest Harley-Davidsons Ever Sold to the Public
Verdad Gallardo
7 Times Harley-Davidson Chucked Tradition Out the Window
Verdad Gallardo
7 Surprising Harley-Davidson Products that Are Not Motorcycles
Verdad Gallardo
8 Best Harley-Davidson Motorcycles Ever
Pouria Savadkouei
10 Worst Harley-Davidson Motorcycles Ever
Pouria Savadkouei
Killer Custom's Jail Break Is The Breakout That Refused to Blend In
Verdad Gallardo
Crazy Bunderbike Build Looks Amazing, But Is It Impossible to Ride?
Verdad Gallardo
Harley-Davidson Reveals Super Cool Cafe Racer Concept
Verdad Gallardo
Engraved Rebellion: Inside Bundnerbike's Glam Rock II
Verdad Gallardo
-Moderator-"Wench with a Wrench and Queen of Quips"
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 10,252
Likes: 1,980
From: Breaux Bridge, LA
I've been hit twice. Just recently got my new ride (my old one was totalled in the last wreck). Riding with one arm is an interesting experience. As previously posted, short rides at first untill you get your confidence back.
After the first time I was hit, I got back on as soon as my leg healed enough to take the weight of the bike. I was nervous as hell at first, but it passes.
After the first time I was hit, I got back on as soon as my leg healed enough to take the weight of the bike. I was nervous as hell at first, but it passes.
Club Member
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 66,137
Likes: 51,478
From: Niles Canyon Ca.
What a few have said in here , park it till your ready or not . Putting yourself out there in the state you've described will get you hurt or worse . You'll make bad decisions or freeze when a clear head is needed and a call has to be made now , lost friends to this .