For those of you who are joiners - want to ask about your experiences with HOG chapters. Decided to join the local HOG. Attended the first meetintg last month - the meeting had a really good turnout - I would guess over 40 members. I arrived alone about 20 minutes before the meeting. Signed up at the table at the entrance and walked in. Noone made an effort to approach me except for the Chapter pres. who spent a little time talking to me to find out about me. Other than that, no other members talked to me. I sat through the meeting at a table where some other singles were - engaged in conversation and found out that they also were newer members, I participated in the evening auction event to raise funds for that evening charitable cause. I left after feeling very excluded.

Today was the local chapters' annual HOG picnic. Arrived with hubby about 3 hours into the event (10am-3pm). A total of about 20 were in attendance. We walked up to the 'event' and some people at a full table pointed to a table full of food and said help yourselves. We were a little unsure since we hadn't brought anything but headed in that direction. Of all those there, we spoke with two individuals - both after we took the initiative and introduced ourselves. Everyone else (we found out was the "core" group) talked among themselves in 'cluster groups' - never approaching, although we tried to position ourselves so we could have engaged in a conversation. After about 1/2 hour - the picnic was wrapped up (it was cold and drizzly here...) and we left.

I guess I am a little miffed. Strangers walking into a group - my first inclination would be to go and introduce myself and try to make them feel welcomed. Take them around and introduce them to people. We felt very much like "outsiders" and "newcomers" the entire time and what surprised me even more was that none of the chapter's 'officers' made any moves either. I wasn't looking for people to rush up to us and gush over us and stuff like that. Just a little less of a 'left out on the limb' feeling or less of a 'clique' type of environment.

So, why am I telling you guys about this? Because I am wondering if I am being overly sensitive? AI just thought that having some things in common - a HD and a love of riding would be the ice breakers? Should we continue to go to the meetings and particpate in rides and maybe start feeling more 'included'? Or, if this is not typical, maybe join another HOG chapter? I know one has to start somewhere's sometime.

Just curious what everyone elses experiences have been.

 

I am not part of my local chapter yet but have read about them on their website. One of the things they do is give a free tshirt away to the members of take people around and introduce them. This is because they had the same problem you are mentioning. It takes a certain personality of person just to grab newbies and make them feel at home. Not very many people are outgoing enough to do that. Your group may not have had such a person that day.

My advice would be to stick around. People will come out of their shell eventually and you will be glad you put in the time.

 

Don't know what to say Annie, unless, if you had'nt had a bath in weeks, had on Honda jackets, bad breath, just plain ugly, front teeth rotted out, road up on a junker that was wired together, had fleas, etc.. If it was'nt any of that, they were just plain old rude in my book.

I would go back to the next function, and kill them with kindness, walk up and introduce yourselves to everyone that you can, act like you have known them for years, comment how nice their bikes look. yep kill em with kindness.

John TN

 

That is kind of a bummer Annie. You're right they should have made you felt more welcome after all that's what it's all about, friendship comaradery etc. But like Humanoid said, they will come around. I too am going to join the local chapter and hope to get a warmer welcome. After I feel more comfortable myself I'll definately take the initiative to make new members welcome.

 

Hell Annie, Except for the Honda jackets, I'd still introduce to my friends. (Then I asks myself, what friends???).
People think that they're friendly, because they're friendly with each other.
Are you being overly sensitive? I really wouldn't have a clue. My wife tells me all the time that I'm too sensitive about other people. Weell, I've had my share of Hell with nice friendly people...but we aren't going there.
I did learn one thing, however, and that is to deal directly with individuals. If you want his and think it might be worthwhile, go back one more time. Walk up to one of the old members and tell them your experience and ask them what it takes to get included and ask if you're wasting your time. Most groups that have been together for a shile don't realize that they are not welcoming to newcomers. Maybe deep down inside they have been acting this way for so long that they've seen lots of newcomers come and go, think that they have been rejected and perhaps are afraid that they will be rejected again and can only trust someone that comes back and goes for rides with them.
Personally, it sounds like my kind of group. I like hanging around on the outside and sizing things up. It's those "friendly" people that scare the heck out of me.

 

The local chapter here cringes when they see my Sloptail within 100 miles of one of their events! The HD shop parts guys look up when I hit the counter, then simply ask, "What are you doing to that old bike now?"

Seriously, give 'em a couple more chances. Ride with them, and see if they are what you want.

 

Our HOG Chapter has over 600 members, we make it a point to welcome the new ones at each meeting and include them in rides etc. I think you shouod check out another chapter anad let that one turn to dust. Soon enough they will figure out that new members keep it going.

 

Annie,

Sorry about your experience but I would give them another chance if I were you. My chapter has around 300 members and have treated me (and all three of my wives) very good. Anytime you have that many in one group you are going to have cliques "core members". Once they see what great people you and your husband are they will come around. Go on a couple of rides with them and you will get to know them better.


Terry

 

Howdy Ann, I'm a person that judges sometimes by first impressions. I can understand your position. I'm not sure what I would do if I had been in your position. Personally, maybe you should give them another chance, and if they treat you the same as they treated you the last time, then I would deal with it then. Good Luck

 

Annie, I wouldn't worry about the folks not being too friendly. Just hang around for a bit and see if the things they do as a chapter are things you would enjoy participating in. If so, then keep going to their functions. They will warm up.

Even though I am a member of the local HOG group, I don't participate in many of their functions because they aren't things I particularly enjoy. My wife and I are very active in our local CMA chapter and that is where we do most of our group bike stuff. However, when we ride, normally it is just her and I which is our preference.