Should I or shouldn't I
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Road Captain
Joined: Feb 2009
Posts: 502
Likes: 0
From: lone grove, oklahoma
Should I or shouldn't I
I've got a bike trip planned with the wife and a few friends this weekend but my 15 year-old kid has come down with a bad cold, hopefully she will be feeling better by Fri. but if not my wife won't be going on this trip. The group I'm going with will be all couples and we got a group rate on the hotel, if I don't go we won't get that rate. My wife knows how much I've been looking forward to this and wouldn't tell me not to go so would you go and leave your wife tending to an ailing child or not go and stay home to help her.
Road Master
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 990
Likes: 10
From: Redondo Beach, California
If it is just a cold then there is really nothing that you can do to help your teenage daughter get better, sooner. She just needs to hydrate and rest. She can do that with or without you being there. If your wife is already planning to stay with her with or without you being there then you staying too is not necessary for your daughters recovery. Plus, in the past, have you been the person that your daughter has normally looked to when she got sick? If you were normally working when your daughter got ill in the past then she may just be expecting your wife to be there for her anyway. If you were normally the one that stayed home when she got sick than that might be a little bit different and if you and your wife switched with each other when she got sick in the past than she should be just fine with her mother watching out for her this time too! Just the facts! Guilt and conscience are different things. You may feel guilty that you went on a planned trip while your wife stayed at home to nurse your daughter. That is something that you have to justify to yourself. Your role as a parent, are you abdicating it? If your wife is attending to your teenage daughters needs then how is your absence neglecting your familys needs? Will your wife condone your leaving? If she will resent you and hold it over you that you left without her or that you left at all, than you may need to bail out of this trip. There will always be other trips to take. Are there Grandparents that might be able to help out for a bit? Grandparents can be somewhat magical at times. Just a thought! Being a parent sometimes means sacrifices have to be made for the better cause. Good luck with your decision. 
Road Master
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 773
Likes: 24
From: Findlay, ohio
Do what is best for your daughter. That is your primary (and only) concern. There will be other road trips that you can make up, but you may not have a chance again to put your daughter first. Let your heart be your guide.
Hope it all works our for you.
Hope it all works our for you.
Road Warrior
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 1,549
Likes: 8
From: North Texas
Assume you've taken her into a Dr to possibly speed up the recovery, and to verify it's not that damn Swine Flu ...
If she's not better then, you already know the answer to your question. Do what your heart tells ya. You wouldn't enjoy the trip anyway under those circumstances.
If she's not better then, you already know the answer to your question. Do what your heart tells ya. You wouldn't enjoy the trip anyway under those circumstances.
Elite HDF Member
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 4,020
Likes: 69
From: Twin Cities, MN
My friend bailed on a trip last fall at the last minute, and we were in the same situation. As a good friend he still paid for his room even though he didn't go. Just not to **** us off. That's another option for you.
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Extreme HDF Member
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 10,449
Likes: 46
From: Roswell, GA
If the wife doesn't feel right about going, time to be a husband and dad and help the wife with the daughter, use the time at home to take care of the "honey do list," and not be pissy about missing the trip.
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Elite HDF Member
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 4,020
Likes: 69
From: Twin Cities, MN
Boy it sure depends on the wife. Wife #1 would be breathing fire "you're not leaving me home with a sick kid". Wife #2 would say "go and have a good time! I can catch up on my gardening etc...." and when I got home she would still not hold it against me. I love wife #2!
