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I'm thinking the neck bearings need tightening. My Ultra would ride straight and true hands off the bars as long as you had throttle or constant speed on it. Slowing down to a stop, about 2200 rpm the bars would start to tank slap without hands on the bars. Had the neck bearings tightened and the problem went away regardless of what load I was carrying. You may be just getting to the point they should be adjusted.
VERY curious problem... The RPM-link is significant/intriguing and that you can feel a suspicious vibration through the rear brake... The tour-pak connection is odd but not out of the realm... I assume that you have checked all engine mounts, stabilizers and wheel bearings... Perhaps the RPM 'connection' is that it creates a peculiar 'harmonic' that triggers/enables this tank-slap pheno... There is a fair amount of lateral flex in that frame and with an additional 'issue' such as neck-bearing, wheel bearing, engine mount, stabilizer problem and added tour-pak/weight... Who did the work for the tour-pak docking/mounts... Check that mount and the rear shocks symmetry... I am just thinking out loud here guys...
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